The World According to Dark Tourist

OK my lovelies,

After much ado, hullabaloo, and outright poo, I’ve finally watched the episode of Dark Tourist that contained GVC members in it.  Ya know what I saw.  EXACTLY WHAT I EXPECTED TO.

Casual observation of the episode produces THIS synopsis: A person who is looking to understand the community based on his OWN point of view WHICH, by the way, had NOTHING to do with experience WITHIN the GVC.  This person, a journalist, with a sensationalized, produced for the limited attention span of the masses, wannabe scare-a-thon…

I watched as KNOWN vampires, Lord Chaz, Maven, Logan, and Daley appeared in the first portion to show their connections to vampirism.  Attempts to be enigmatic aside, they opened up themselves to show this person vampirism from THEIR perspective.  They shared Logan and Daley’s love for each other with the world by sharing a piece of their wedding.  Maven shared his thoughts and bared a piece of HIS soul…  All of it wasn’t the surreal “acting” piece that so many people seemed to make it out to be.  They weren’t garishly dressed.  They weren’t being all Shakespearean in effort. They were just being THEM.

So why all the hullabaloo over how they were dressed, acted, or whatever… I didn’t see the person/journalist being an asshole.  I saw them asking questions and getting nonplussed answers to those questions in an attempt to be enigmatic.  *shrug* When you allow a journalist to develop their own POV about what you are attempting to explain to them, you can’t be enigmatic and nonplussed in your answers… They will ALWAYS jump to the wrong conclusion on whatever the topic is… ESPECIALLY in a show that is based on sensationalism.

I watched as New Orleans Vampire Association members opened up their home and lives for the camera to celebrate one of their own in keeping with their own traditions.  I watched as, yet again, I performed a “clean technique” which WAS explained (yet somehow didn’t make it into the final cut… Ah. The magic of editing!!) as it is during EVERY filming.  Donovan (Sheoul, as he is known in the local community) WAS/IS a roommate, was not homeless when he moved in, and, this was his very first appearance on-screen.  Nervous. Yes.  He is not one of my regular Donors.  He was a stand-in because 2 of my Donors were out-of-town, 1 was sick, and the last one DOES NOT WANT TO BE ON CAMERA AT ALL due to his job sensitivity.

Unlike what people want to proclaim, this is and was the truth of the situation.

Editing notwithstanding, this episode wasn’t the worst thing filmed by any of the members of the GVC on ANY level.  The journalist was able to see MULTIPLE people within the community, straight, LGBT, dressed up, and in jeans and t-shirts… The only true issue I have is that for ALL of the time they spent with BOTH sets of Vampires, they cut it down to a 15 minute segment.  How is ANYONE supposed to get a clear view of the GVC if people film for days at a time to whittle it down to a 15 minute segment?

NOW FOR THE BITCH SECTION of this writing…

If you’re so fucking insecure about yourself that you have to tear someone else down due to the piss poor editing of a show, then maybe you should rethink your fucking role as a “leader” of the GVC.  I’m sorry… To attack someone based on a NON-GVC member’s point of view because you chose to PURPOSELY be enigmatic and nonplussed in your answering of questions is ASININE, at best. It is the height of STUPIDITY, at worst.  Worse yet, to attack someone’s sexuality… That numbers you among the lowest of the low. PERIOD.  I don’t expect an apology.  I don’t demand an apology.  I DESERVE an apology for your homophobic rhetoric… I know it won’t come, however, because of your own attitude. You echoed the same lies, in your heinous, whiny, bitchfest that others have attempted to slander me with over the years… Only this time… This time, you chose to post the lies to your wall and attempt to justify your lies by belittling any who spoke the truth to you.  Yeah… How very Trumplethinskin of  you… Typical of someone who doesn’t want to face the truth.  The truth is THE SHOW made you feel all assblasted butthurt.  The piss poor editing, the shoddy narration, and the lackadaisical journalist… NOT me.  NOT NOVA… The SHOW.

We won’t even get into the fact that NOVA attempted to drop out of the filming when the crew told us how you “invited” yourselves to participate in it because we didn’t want to be associated with ANYTHING you were part of.  It was the film company that stated that they wanted us to remain part of the filming because they felt you guys were ‘overacting’ and ‘unrealistic in your approach’… *shrug* We tried, they still wanted us to be part of it all.  In the end, they twisted everything from WHY I blessed Lori’s home to every aspect of your ‘performance’ before their cameras.

By all means, however… PLEASE… Continue to blame NOVA and me for the editing of a second rate travel program on a pay-per-view channel.  It shows just how much pull we, as an organization, have throughout the world… (that’s sarcasm, asshats…)

Oh… And to the OTHER person attempting to say the same thing EVEN after people who ACTUALLY lived with me for YEARS spoke up, your blind hatred of me shone through.  Blind.  Hatred.  That’s OK, dear.  We know that you’ve had a hard on for me since the day you announced how you and yours were leaving the community and I told you it was a foolish thing to do… Since then, any way to trash me, my work, my motivation, and anything else I am part of.  Nice try though.  Especially since your ‘key witness’ has never lived with me… EVER… *shrug*  Which means that it is unsubstantiated rumor, at best.  Thanks for playing the “let’s trash Zaar because I’m all butthurt that he wouldn’t support my effort to have Sanguine Vampires walk away from the GVC”… Johnny, tell her what she get’s to leave with!!!

Buh… Buh… Buh-bye.  Do come again…


Batten down the hatches, ladies and gentlemen, and secure the mainsail.  She’s gonna be a blow!!!


Everyone in the GVC has, at one point or another, felt the loss of a family member, friend, beloved pet/furbaby.  There is no… Let me repeat that for the members in the back of the audience… THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR BAD BEHAVIOR AND BELITTLING A PERSON OVER SUCH A LOSS.

IF, and I DO mean “IF”, you are the kind of person that can’t empathize or sympathize with someone over such a fucking loss.  KEEP YOUR FUCKING COMMENTS TO YOURSELF.  It shouldn’t matter whether or not you agree with their particular brand of politics, religious views, societal role, past misbehaviors, appearances, whathaveyou, THEY had a loss.  I don’t care what your association with the GVC is.  I don’t care whether you’re Vampire, Donor, Therian, Otherkin, Black Swan (supporter), interested party, or Vampiriologist.  You’re a disgusting piece of shit, to me, if you can’t be civil long enough to acknowledge the grief another is going through.

Who the fuck made you the fucking moral monitor of who does and does not deserve empathy/sympathy in a loss of this caliber? What fucking right have you to even fucking comment on who the people are or what they have or have not done, when a post is about FUCKING LOSS? I don’t care WHO the fuck you THINK you are, you’re a disgusting piece of shit if you can’t simply acknowledge a person’s loss and grief all the while making petty swipes at what you do or do not like about this fucking interview, that fucking appearance or what the fuck ever.  Grow the fuck up you high school wannabe acting fucks.

It is times of loss and grief that you’re supposed to be supportive of a community member, whether you agree with their motivations or not.  It is times of loss, suffering, and grief that we are supposed to reach out and PROVE that we are working towards making the community a better, more accepting place for ALL members of the community no matter what group they are affiliated with and no matter whether or not you agree with that group or their tactics.

A Personal Message to Logan, Daley, and Michelle:

Logan and Daley, I am sorry for your loss.  I know the grief of losing a furbaby.  When my Lucy Lu was taken from me by a hit and run driver right out in front of my home, it devastated me.  I still, to this day, feel the loss.  May you speed to recovery and may your remaining furbabies close the gaping whole left by your loss.

Michelle.  Never let assholes stop you from being the beautiful soul you are.  I don’t give a damn WHO they are.  Be you. Post what you want. Stop trying to appease everyone and work towards doing things you know make YOU feel better.

The Vampire is Not Always Right

There’s a little website I’ve been following ever since my days in retail: Not Always It’s full of stories about customers who were wrong, and couldn’t understand why. As the years went on, they expanded to complaints about idiot co/workers (Not Always Working), students/teachers (Not Always Learning), romantic partners (Not Always Romantic), family members (Not Always Related), friends (Not Always Friendly), healthcare (Not Always Healthy), legal (Not Always Legal), and uplifting stories of hope (Not Always Hopeless). They honestly need to add a “Not Always Vampiric” section.

A common adage in the world is “Just because you have an opinion, it doesn’t make you right”, but people sadly keep forgetting this. Just look at political debates on your Facebook and Twitter timelines. Every person in those arguments has an opinion. Are they all right? They think so. Doesn’t mean they are, though. There’s a political cartoon that has been floating around, which people interpret as “Both sides are correct in their thinking”, the true meaning going over people’s heads until an edited form started in circulation. As it states in the edited form, only one of those people is correct. You have to look at other factors to determine who is in the right: Landmarks, other numbers on the ground nearby of the same style, etc. Same goes for views in the Global Vampire Community. NGwd99W

Vampirism, if we look at it from a medical standpoint, would be classified as a “Spectrum Disorder”, much like Autism is, where there are similarities amongst the people with the condition, but significant differences from person to person. Another spectrum it could be compared to is the political spectrum from Conservative to Liberal. So, let’s take a closer look at it in that viewpoint. We’ll put Sanguinarians on one end, Psychics on the other end, and Hybrids in the middle. Vampiricspectrum1

Now, Suzy Q is a pure psi vamp, has never tried blood, or has and it made her vilely ill, but she feeds on her environment primarily, so she’ll be Aaaaaalll the way over here. Vampiricspectrum2

Johnny is a Med-Sang (a Sanguinarian vampire who believes that their condition is purely physiological, and not metaphysical in any way, shape, or form). He’ll go to the extreme other end of the scale, like so. Vampiricspectrum3

Now, Mary is a hybrid, who leans sang heavy, just barely using psi energy, often subconsciously. She’ll be in the middle, but closer to Johnny than to Suzy. Vampiricspectrum4

Thomas is also a hybrid, but he only takes blood when he has a very strong craving, say, once every few of months, if not longer. He’ll be closer to Suzy in the middle area. Vampiricspectrum5

Matt is a hybrid, but he needs everything in fairly equal amounts. He is what some would call a “pure hybrid”. He’ll be smack dab in the middle. Vampiricspectrum6

Now, you might be asking “But, Pixie, what about the two other arrows close to the extreme?” Lemme give an option for them. The arrow close to Johnny is not a hybrid, but a sang. But Harry the Sang thinks that his vampirism isn’t purely physiological, but also maybe something metaphysical. Perhaps he thinks that something with his soul caused his vampirism, who knows. He might have tried to feed energetically and it did nothing for him or made him feel worse. Let’s put him on our chart. Vampiricspectrum7

Now, the last psi arrow. Well, let’s say that Suzy gets her energy from her environment like elemental vampires, not necessarily from people. But, on the other hand, Kay can’t do that, they need a human donor for their psychic energy feedings. She is still a true psi, blood makes her sick or does nothing for her like Suzy, but she can’t feed off of say, a thunderstorm or a tree. Vampiricspectrum8

So, now we have our little group of vampiric friends. They are all vampires, so, by some people’s opinions, what works for one should work for the others, right? Wrong. Kay can’t feed like Suzy can, even though they are both considered to be Psi’s. Thomas, Matt, and Mary are more similar, but also different in subtle ways. And what works for Johnny and Harry wouldn’t entirely work for Thomas, since he rarely needs to ingest blood to stay healthy. Even Johnny and Harry have their differences in how they handle their feeding. Johnny goes very methodological, documenting what he ate, how often he feeds and at what volume, any other medical conditions that might plague him, etc., whereas Harry might go at it with a more spiritual approach. Yes, he might feed as often and the same volume as Johnny, but he doesn’t think his vampirism is something that a medical or genetic test can find.

A problem that we have is people thinking that all vampires are vampires, and that’s pure fallacy. It’s more like the dog analogy: All collies are dogs, but not all dogs are collies. All Sangs are vampires, but not all vampires are Sangs. And even further than that, not all Sangs are Med-Sangs, and not all Psi’s are Elemental Psi’s. There are extremes on both ends of the vampirism spectrum, and learning to look outside of your own little box, where you’ve neatly explained to yourself what your vampirism is and why we might have a more cohesive community. No one caring what kind of vampire you are, and when told “Hey, that doesn’t work for me, I’ve tried it”, you back off and take it in.

The same goes for vampiric politics. Some people are Ronin, the vampiric equivalent to the Pagan Solitary Witch. They alone determine their vampirism, not where they fit into the community. Some need to be in a group for support but say a smaller one, consisting of family and close friends. Others need to be in a bigger group, like a House or Court, with varying ranges of castes, ranks, or positions.

Same rule applies here: What works for you won’t work for everyone else. You can evangelize the wonders of your path from here to Timbuktu, doesn’t mean that your path would work for me, or for the guy sitting next to me.

There is a difference between giving advice and preaching. There’s a difference between taking constructive criticism and learning from it and jumping into defensive mode whenever someone says a negative opinion about your beliefs. The better person works on learning said differences and focuses on giving advice and taking constructive criticism and not preaching or lashing out when someone disagrees with us. Not only are you stunting your growth as a person if you lash out at people who disagree with you, but you’re stunting the growth of new members of the community, making them afraid to come forward with their questions, opinions, and ideas so they stop learning, hiding in their little corner away from the Negative Nelly’s.

“But, Pixie!” you cry. “Why should I back off if someone says something doesn’t work for them? They must be doing something wrong or they need more practice, obviously. I’ve been a vampire for umpteen number of years, so, therefore, know more than noobs!” Wrong. You know more about your form of vampirism and your section of the community than most. You don’t know much more about any other kind of vampirism than Joe Blow down the street who just watches vampire movies for the scare factor. Until you are able to walk in their shoes, feel their needs, suffer from the negative side effects of their specific kind of vampirism, you honestly don’t know jack squat, and this is the point where you’re to go “Oh, okay then.” and back off. Phrases like “This works for me, but your mileage may vary” are better than “This works for me, so it should definitely work for you.” The latter phrase implying “If it doesn’t work for you, are you sure you’re a vampire?”, which can have significant negative effects on the new members of the community, and the community as a whole.

If you’re a member of the Global Vampiric Community, you need to realize that just because you’re a vampire, that doesn’t make you always right.

WTF do you mean you’re a vampire?

CapGoF says

A question popped up on my radar about two weeks back: “Are you really serious about Vampires?”

My first reaction was to type back and say, “Take a look around dumbass, I have Vampyre friends, I run a Vampire E-Zine, I interview Vampires, my bios – EVERYWHERE – relate my own life experiences as a modern living Vampire. H-E-L-L-OHHHH, what’s the fuckin’ weather like on your planet? Then I stepped back and read the question again and I thought about the VC, the “community”, the Culture.

There are so many people jammed in here now who still have no bloody idea, no clue, no original thought or concept of what it means to live as a ‘human Vampire’, they have no idea what a Vampire even is but they run around like some badass mutha with a damn chaingun just sprayin’ shit everywhere.

Pretenders, Poseurs, Wannabes and fucksticks who think it’s a hoot to slap a pair of theatrical fangs in two or three times a year and act all mysterious and stealthy for fucksakes.

When are they going to get the hint and fuck off?

Genuine questions about genuine Vampire life experiences are one thing, dumbass questions about whose political corner you’re in, what side are you on, where your loyalties lie, why do you have so-and-so on your friends list… that’s not about Vampires, that’s about your own insecurities and your insignificance in the grand Vampyre scheme of things so don’t come bothering me with them. I, frankly, don’t give a flying feathered fuck what your politics are, either mundane or Vamp, I, personally, don’t give a toss who you have on your friends list on FuckBook. I can block anyone’s ass as quick as look at them…and when I come across some pathetic, whiny, blustering dick (or dickette ) you better bet your last sorry ass buck I will eliminate them from my cyberworld and I sure as shit won’t lose any sleep over it. Let’s face it, in some seventeen odd years in the online VC my personal shitlist has grown from seventeen to fifty three. And of the last thirty-six names added only one name is a “mundane” real world, not online, person. Go figure!!!

So, before you come at me with your cape swirling and your carefully crafted toothy grin remember, YOU have NO cred with me. Don’t be tellin’ me you’re some badass “Queen of The Damned” or “Prince of the Night”, don’t be tellin’ me you’re some ancient blood-line Vampyre family that dates back to the fuckin’ Babylonian fuckin’ Empire… TRUTH… you’re a fuckstick looking for a hole to crawl into. Go play your stupid games someplace else, or watch Buffy re-runs, or some fuckin’ thing.

There’s a whole world of REAL Vampires out here, doin’ it tough, every day, just getting’ by like every other mutha. Battling to pay the mortgage, the rent, the bills, find the money for gas, insurance and groceries. We’re not playing at being what we are, we are struggling with all of that PLUS how to keep “fed”, well and healthy on top of everything else so don’t come the, “Poor me, nobody understands me, I’m so lost and misunderstood, I’m such a lonely Vampire who just wants to be accepted into the community!” – REAL VAMPIRES DON’T PISS, MOAN AND WHINE ALL THE TIME – we do what we have to, with strength, courage and a measure of dignity just so we can survive this fucked up world.
‘Nuff said.

Donors Are Friends, Not Food



Yeah, yeah, I get it. You are Teh Uber Lord McDarkity Vamp, the supreme deluxe predator, and everyone else is either food or fucktoy. But let’s get real for a minute. Donors are not cheeseburgers and chattel slavery is so 1860. If you’re dreaming of 69 red silk kitten porn stars begging to wear your pearl necklace, you’re going to be disappointed, sparky. That’s not how any of this works. You can’t head over to the nearest McDonor’s and order up a super jumbo size Happy Ending Meal. You may think you worship at the altar of the apex predator but the reality is that you’re a dick unless you give donors the respect they deserve. And that means seeing them as human beings with agency first, last, and always.

Now I know words that have more than one syllable, like “agency”, are difficult for you to understand. It’s okay, reading is hard. Think of it this way: You are not the boss of a donor.¹ Donors are independent people capable of making free choices. Donors have rights and they deserve to have those rights respected at all times. You need them more than they need you, so try not to be too big of a douchecanoe. There are no shortcuts to finding a person willing to let you drink their blood or energy. You’re going to have to take the radical approach of being a person worthy of earning a donor’s trust. Objectifying donors and referring to them as “food” or as a resource you can “farm” without their consent² is degrading. Knock it the fuck off.

Right about now you’re probably getting your panties in a twist and screaming “you’re not the boss of me.” And you’re right, I’m not. Guess what – I’mma still call you out, motherfucker. Because your attitude is fucked up. This isn’t about dictating what happens between consenting adults. It’s about recognizing the dignity of other human beings. Donors are not prey animals and you are not a wolf, a shark, a good shepherd or whatever pseudo-naturalistic fantasy you’ve concocted for yourself. But this article really isn’t for you. 

This article is for everyone else. The GVC has not cornered the market on predators. Not even close. There are predators at the library and the supermarket and in the cubicle across the office. This is for the people who think your busted-ass bullshit is normal because that’s the dynamic they saw growing up and it continues to play out in their relationships to this day. Or the ones who think it’s normal because that’s the only experience they’ve had with the GVC and they don’t know any better.

This. Is. Not. Normal. This is abuse, plain and simple.

The same goes for anyone who says donors should “know their place” or that donors have no right to speak and should not expect to have a voice in the GVC, despite the undeniable fact that what happens in the GVC impacts donors just as much as it does vampires. Someone who espouses this attitude isn’t likely to change. They’re beyond hope, a lost cause. But this attitude is all too common in the GVC and it needs to stop. Seriously, if someone you know expresses this sort of attitude, run the hell away. This is three gallons of craycray in a 2-gallon bucket and you don’t need that mess in your life.


¹ Even in the context of a BDSM relationship, both partners have power. Otherwise, there could be no power exchange. A partner who identifies as submissive or a slave still has the power to say “no.” Even if the individual has agreed to a total power exchange, the submissive partner can end the relationship if the dominant partner disregards or violates the negotiated boundaries.

² Consent is a mutual agreement about what will happen which is entered into without manipulation or coercion by either party.

If you or someone you know has experienced consent violations, including sexual assault or domestic violence, these resources can provide more information. Some of them may be able to help get you or your loved one to safety.


Submissive’s Bill of Rights:


Domestic Violence Hotline:


“Ye Olden Days” of the GVC

There’s been a LOT of talk in the GVC of pining for the “old days”. Sadly, OLDER Vampires have forgotten what the “old days” were ACTUALLY like and the YOUNGER Vampires are attempting to succor themselves on a bazillion different stories of “past glories” created by a specific contingent of people without actually knowing or understanding what it is they are even asking to have happen.

Let me tell you something. Aside from the pageantry and the mildly outlandish need to drape everything in Edwardian/Victorian garb, the community WASN’T as glamorous and “glorious” as people want to remember it. It was dark, nefarious, and stained with attitudes and egos to the point that any normal person looking in would have turned from it as nothing more than a collection of nutters needing a much larger sanitarium for the clinically insane. From the outside view, it was nothing more than a wannabe gothic style rendition of club kids gone wrong. And the INSIDE look wasn’t much better.

Inside… Inside pompous ego driven drivel spewed as “the Gospel of So-N-So the Such-N-Such of the (now adding the word ‘modern’) Vampire Community”… Really? REALLY?? It has been established that there WERE Houses long before the dark nights at Mother’s from “back in the day”. Grinding music mixed with dark fantasy action, derelict souls, drugs, alcohol, and, on special occasions, violence to “offending parties” who may or may not have known what ‘offense’ they were accused of committing… We weren’t the “glorious beings” of unbridled wisdom, culture, and class that some would have you believe we were. No. We were decadent, dirty, and could get downright rude. Like I said, we were a gothic style of club kids gone wrong. And there is no glory or honor in that. PERIOD.

Yeah. Go ahead and long for the “Good Ol’ Days”, I’m gonna stick with watching the crop of new, up and coming community members and lend them whatever help that I am able, for as long as I am able, however, don’t think I will make it completely easy on them. It wasn’t easy on me, when I first entered the community, so why should I make it easy on the next generations?

“Respect my authority!!” seems to be a cry that both young and old alike tend to rally around, however, there’s one problem with that. Each area, each group, each House/Clan/Coven/Order, is more like its own city kingdom and ONLY the people IN these particular groupings hold any sway OVER those groupings. Your vaunted ‘authority’ extends to the limits of that which you THINK is your territory. And I do mean ‘THINK’. Unless you are a duly elected, voted for by the entirety of the public in YOUR city, county/parish, or state, you haven’t got a leg to stand on when claiming territory. Sorry to those who feel otherwise, however, this is why Feds tend to look at groupings of Vampires like gangs… We’re territorial over NOTHING… Especially with all the newfangled groups popping up in what was already established territories and undermining the established groups that were there before.

SPEAKING of (and to) the Younger members of the community… Since when, IN ANY COMMUNITY on the face of the planet, is it an AUTOMATIC action to grant respect to those newly entering the community? (There isn’t one) ESPECIALLY a community that has built itself up around a mythical creature KNOWN for being a bit of a bastard when it came to their own children and younger members of their species? A creature known for being the penultimate predator? When people come to me, who happen to be younger/new to the community and DEMAND the same respect that a person who has been in the community 10, 15, 20, even 25+ years in the community, the ONLY thing I can do is laugh at them and think to myself, “petulant child” and turn to the next person asking a legitimate question about what it is to be a Vampire. I’m an old fart from what seems to be worlds away. I grew up in TWO communities where Elders were treated with dignity and respect (whether or not they were currently doing things for those communities) and the thought of FORCING them out because they were too old did not cross anyone’s mind for long… And it DAMNED sure wasn’t sought after by people DEMANDING them to move over so THEY could take over. (Yes, there were exceptions to the rule, however, this WAS the rule) Elders were simply respected and sought out for council, wisdom, and understanding where we came from.

We, the older generation, are NOT morally obligated to just hand over everything we’ve learned through our years in the GVC dealing with our condition. You want respect, GIVE IT. I do TRY to be respectful, however, even I have my limits on how much attitude, stupidity, rudeness, and disrespect I will take before I blow a gasket at someone. When it happens, answers become snippy and sharp, filled with just as much attitude and disrespect as I felt I received. When one of my friends calls me out for being wrong, or I calm down and re-read my shit, I have been known to apologize. *shrug* I’m not perfect and have never pretended to be.

No. Instead, we have an ever increasing gap between disrespectful youth and active (and not so innocent) elders. So much so that the GVC, as a whole, has devolved into nothing more than an attention seeking shouting match over who deserves what and why they feel that way. This, to me, is the saddest part of being in the community. Such an impasse. Such a Great Rift. Such a fucking, drawn out, overly emotionalized drama fest that I can’t believe it is STILL going on with ALL of the people stating “let’s be adults about this”… JesusHChristOnACrutch…

How do we fix these issues? How do we, as an identity group, stop the madness that seems to be ever present in each and every topic posted in each and every group, blog, email chain, whathaveyou?
1) Stop romanticizing the “Good Ol’ Days”. Those of us who lived through them and weren’t part of the “in crowd” (you know who they were) KNOW that they weren’t as glorious and grand as certain people are making them out to be. Ye Olden Days were filled with just as much horseshit, drama, infighting, anger, hatred, and jealousy that we see present in TODAY’S GVC. It is tragic to see the number of people trying to “relive their glory days” by assuming positions of power over OTHER communities… All in the name of “Ye Olden Days”…
2) Stop fantasizing that ONE certain group of people created the community, it was in existence before I entered it at the age of 13 in 1978 and some records, just from my initial ‘House’ dated back to the 1930s when we were nothing more than an “offshoot” of the pagan communities. I give them props for being one of the first to organize to the point of hosting out of the coffin events, however, they WERE NOT THE BEGINNING OF THE COMMUNITY and to play otherwise is asinine, at best.
3) Stop tuning out whenever any younger member of the community approaches you, if you are an older member of the community. Stop trying to intimidate and DEMAND respect from the older members who may or may not know (of) you. Stop assuming either way that respect is supposed to be mutual. Its not. Respect is an earned quality and only through action and dignity can you hope to earn it from people. In the GVC, most notably, respect is granted by some of us to everyone, until you prove your little more than shit and shinola, then, those like me, will show you courtesy, however, we will not respect you.
4) IF, someone has offended you, don’t pretend you didn’t do anything to earn that shit. Man/Woman up and admit that you may have done something to earn the ire and FUCKING APOLOGIZE! JesusFrigginChristOnACrutch!!! People saying “I’m sorry” (and meaning it) is about as rare as finding a virgin now-a-days to sacrifice to a volcano for good weather… (a joke fuckers, get over yourselves) Seriously, though, apologize and mean it. It goes a LONG way to smooth things over.
5) Remember that this is an ever growing, ever evolving community. As nuances are learned of our ‘condition’, each piece of information held needs to be re-evaluated as surely as the pieces of information coming INTO the community. No one member of the GVC… No one House/Clan/Coven/Order of the GVC… holds all of the answers to our condition. I’ve used the term “fully awakened” to describe myself, yet, even I know that I am still learning things about myself and refining the knowledge that I THOUGHT I held about my vampiric condition causing me to re-evaluate and refine how I approach my ‘condition’.
6) Remember that EVERYONE from the newest member of the GVC to the oldest of the old farts speaks from THEIR OWN UNDERSTANDING of their condition. If you do not understand something or need clarification to understand something better… OPEN YOUR FUCKING MOUTHS AND ASK IN A RESPECTFUL MANNER. It’s not that damned hard. Here. Let me give you an example… “Could you please explain to me a little more about what you meant when you wrote/said such-n-such thing in this group/discussion/email/interview/whathaveyou?” Some of you act like you haven’t been to preschool/kindergarten/first or second grade where they harped on subjects like manners…
7) STOP acting like you and yours are the end all be all of the GVC… You’re nothing but another cog in the wheel of progress that has led us from the shadows of reclusive ‘Houses’ to secretly communicating through BDSM mags and gathering at BDSM events to the open gatherings at places like Mother’s to the current incarnation of gatherings we see active in our community in recent years. You’re just another cog… And not even the most innovative one at that. ESPECIALLY with all of the “balls” looking, acting, and being virtually the same shit different location…
8) Start making MORE family friendly events. Yes. FAMILY FRIENDLY. We are seeing more and more members WITH children in the community. I’m not saying to indoctrinate the children, I’m saying plan a friggin day at the zoo, a water park, an amusement park, a family movie. Don’t you want to be able to say we are a WHOLE community? Our children ARE part of our lives and SHOULD be thought of in, at least, local events.
9) START adding LGBT friendly events. With as many of us that are, and have been, part of the GVC, you would think ONE of these money grubbing events would have pulled something in for them. Hell. Even the girl on girl action of the burlesque shows is ONLY to entice the heterosexual males NOT celebrate the Lesbian, Bisexual, and Transwomen of the community. Vanna turn a vowel for these fuckers so that MAYBE, just maybe, they will get a damned clue.
10) Remember, the next generation is watching, listening, and experiencing how the older generations treat them. Fucking act like damned adults and stop trying to speak ABOVE the younger generations as if you’re the most authoritative person on the face of the fucking planet. I’m hard on them, as I’ve mentioned before, however, I do it because I WANT to see them succeed where efforts tried by MY generation failed miserably… Get it. Got it. Good…

Well, this Grumpy Vampire is fucking tired as shit after working all day and typing this missive… Suck it up, buttercups. Only by working together, both generations, will we make this a better community for those following us… NOT by re-inventing the wheel and throwing the same sort of parties every fucking year, ad nauseum.

Sadly, I know this will not reach those it should. Those younger rising stars of the GVC who, though feeling the sting of my generation, are STILL attempting to better the community despite the upheaval of attitude at change that many members of the community bring to the table.

Remember, folks, stagnation equals death. Just like my very first ‘House’, if you stagnate, you die out.



Ageism, Youthism, Kitchens, Pots and Kettles…

Captain grumpy ol’ fuck at your service…

So, you thought you heard it all yesterday? Well, hold on to your panty hose… that’s only part of it. I’d like to request, most respectfully of course, that the young people in the audience grab some popcorn and take a seat…

Right, with that out of the way let’s get to it…

I’ve seen blog posts by and engaged in conversations with senior people in the vampire culture who are vehemently against the perceived lack of respect shown by a great many younger members of our culture. Not all of the “old guard”, of course, not even most, but enough that it’s gotten my attention.

Many of the “old guard” want to have the Vampire culture/community – whatever you want to call it, commanded and operating in a particular way… well… news for y’all – the kitchen has been continually in a chaotic tumble since day one, cast your mind back to the writings of Lady Amy K in the 90’s and beyond, the so called “Psi-Sang wars”, look at the widening rift between the Sanguinarians and the rest of the culture today. Let’s cut to the chase my friends… and I know full well that much of what I am about to put on our table is not going to be what you want to hear, you’re going to take it, run with it, share it and watch as I get ripped to pieces by the veterans – so be it –care factor zero, truth hurts…right but as I mentioned to a friend the other day, it don’t matter who’s telling it, THE truth is still THE truth…!!! You ready? Very well… I realise, fully, that some of you are of the opinion that youngsters in the culture don’t know crap, that they don’t respect enough, that they are ill-mannered, bad tempered, petulant little children who should be railed against and demeaned until they stfu and go away – THAT’S BULLYING – out and out, pure as the driven snow BULLY TACTICS and you can’t dress it up any other way. Can you sit there and tell us you condone bullying? No? Then why do it? We, out here, can only guess.

You are intelligent, yes, you have been doing this a long time, yes, you have a great depth of knowledge and deep ties to the modern Vampire culture and communities but does that make you perfect? I’m not perfect, far from it but the one thing I can do is I can see that there are two sides to every story and that each side has merits – that is unless one side is a complete set of retarded clowns who haven’t got two single digit I.Q.’s to rub together. In many instances we olds do not always direct and employ our natural intelligence, knowledge, wisdom and intuition properly unless it serves to bolster our own ego and sense of importance in the pecking order, that is why we will not succeed in destroying nor stemming the flow of new and young ideas that are encroaching on what we believe to be our own “sacred space”. Whatever it is we are now aiming for it is going to be, in the end analysis, an amalgam of our history and young ideas.

If we fail to realise the bigger picture, to give heed to what we are railing against, we will end up tearing big holes in the community and we will end up losing the trust and respect that we do currently have with younger Vamps within our organisations. Our “protégés” NEED our trust and respect, that way they grow, bloom and become the best they can be to take over after we are dead. They, in their turn, will draw more young talent into the circle and so the Vampire culture will become stronger and longer lasting – if not we are gonna go the same way as the Ancient Roman Empire… and we will all be Nero’s, fiddling while Rome burns. The Vampire Community is based, and built on, decades of effort and work by a number of individuals who are highly respected, looked up to and are trusted… the “old guard” BUT following them are the “new guard” their protégé’s, their students. We OWE it to them not to trash young people wholesale, they put their trust and faith in us – well, he who calls the tune must eventually pay the piper, capiche? It’s a history that won’t be denied.


Yes, this is the “sandpit” of the VC, yes, it’s been that way since everything first got started… politics, arguments, rhetorical mass postings, disturbing discussions, trends and actions, questionable conduct, even borderline criminal conduct and those are the people calling pots black, on the other side of this tumult we’ve got the people banging on their kettles with metal utensils trying their best to make the most noise in the vain hope that everyone will suddenly recognise them, and them alone, as being the be-all-end-all of all things Vampire.

Bottom line, it’s been chaos, why are we so afraid of letting new young chaos in?

I’m going to ask you something now, a little favour, indulge me or not, ‘sup to you… sit down, close your eyes, no, keep them open so you can read… what were you like at 15? 16? 17? 18? 19?

I’ll share something with y’all – I first learned about the pleasures of the opposite sex, in a big way, at 12, I was smoking at 13 (56 now and still dodging the bullet – so what?) at fourteen I was brawling in the high school yard for no better reason than someone looked at this Skinhead the wrong way, at fifteen I was bashing the bullies at high school for picking on my geek or ethnic mates, 16, I became aware of my true nature (the blood is the life right?) 17, drinking like a merchant marine man and dropping “party favours”. I held the local land speed record for car surfing a half mile stretch of highway past a local police station (making cash on the wagers against me) held the record, local, for the longest continuous train surf out of the central city station, 18 and in my apprenticeship (they couldn’t sack indentured apprentices in them days) me and me mates spent more time calling off sick because we were ‘gone surfing’ or stoned off our freaking faces… etc. etc. etc. I could go on but I won’t, I’m sure you get the picture – WE WERE ALL YOUNG ONCE, we were full of piss and vinegar and we owned the fucking world, remember? We didn’t owe anyone anything, not respect, not obedience and not loyalty.

I am not saying this to be mean, belittling or demeaning… I am simply telling it like it is. Remember what I said, it doesn’t matter who is doing the telling, the truth is still the truth… The VC, like all of society, exists because it has become its own entity, its own force and its own support.


While it is true that the foundations were laid down as early as 1966 there will always be, and always have been dissenting voices, even within our own “oldster” ranks, those voices will, however, keep finding exactly what they have found so far – people annoyed, slinging mud all around the place and getting themselves ignored. Trust me, I been playing this game right alongside of ya – not always simply on one side (because in the old D&D parlance I am a “chaotic good character) As for the folks in positions of power who are going to clamp down on this unruly youth element – Best of British to ya, remember the 60’s???

I am GRUMPY that so many of the “old guard” think that these youngsters are assholes simply for saying something they believe. Their language isn’t the same language we grew up with, their society (in RL) is a prick of a place, really, and in order to survive that you need to be a prick right back… Law of the Urban Jungle – So, amigos, older and more senior, therefore supposedly smarter and wiser, get off the dreamboat, If you want the respect, show a little IN GOOD FAITH in return, if you want these young folk to hear your voice, stop moaning about how the younger generation has no respect, start listening to their ideas with an OPEN MIND, you do remember how to do that don’t you? When you speak to them use a proper voice and forms of address and respect the fact that when you’ve gone the way of this fella [insert T-Rex picture] they’ll still be here.


‘Nuff said..!!!

There, I’ve had my say, probably pissed off a good number of people along the way, I’ll say it again, TRUTH HURTS.

This whole comedy started with one writer’s personal opinion of a trend that they saw. Doesn’t mean ALL others thought that way but it has, with all the pissy, moany, whiny crap going on become exactly the thing that the culture has always roundly decried – a circular argument of “who can outbitch the loudest bitch” that is of no value, no substance and serving NO PURPOSE.

“Old guard” – stop moaning like an old hooker at a religious convention.
“Young guard” – stop moaning like an old nun at a Vegas hooker’s convention

It demeans all who claim to have intelligence.